I have Stubbornness Issues

For any of you who have watched How to Train Your Dragon, you’ll recognize my post title (actually, the exact quote is “Vikings have stubbornness issues”). Lots of good quotes in that movie. If you haven’t seen it, you need to check it out.

Anyway, this quote always stuck with me for two reasons: a) most of my family is Norwegian descent, thus making me viking, right? and b) I definitely have stubbornness issues.

I have a hard time letting go. Sometimes that’s a good thing, and sometimes that’s a bad thing.

How can stubbornness be good? It can give you the willpower to keep going when you want to give up. It’s the inner drive that won’t let you let go until you reach the end.

It’s what helped me work the last six months when I didn’t want to get up in the morning and had to say good-bye to my kids. I knew that what I did benefited my family at the time. It’s also what has kept me writing the last eight years (and keeps me from highlighting the entire manuscript and hitting the delete button ).

But stubbornness can can also be bad. Sometimes you do need to let go. There are times when I need to let an issue drop and move on. Or realize I won’t have all the answers as to why something happened.

For example, I’ve been working on my edits the last couple weeks. I try and do a chapter a day. I was working on a more difficult chapter and the day was slowly slipping away. At that point, I should have realized that I needed to walk away and take a break. Spend time with my family. Instead, I hunkered down over my computer and pressed on.

I finished my chapter that day. But I also missed opportunities with my family. Was it worth it? Not in my opinion. When I was tempted to do that again a couple days later, I walked away from my computer and finished later on that night, after the kids were in bed.

That’s when I don’t like being stubborn. Because it’s hard for me to let go. I can get tunnel vision and press on, to the detriment of those around me. But it can also be a good thing, giving me the power to press on. I think in the end, I need to listen when God (and others) speak and say it’s time to let go.

I have stubbornness issues. And yes, I gestured to all of me .